When Tamāla Kṛṣṇa suggested that this incident would hurt their village preaching, Prabhupāda replied, “No, it will be to our favor very soon. I think the central government will take action. This is the same as Kaṁsa against Kṛṣṇa – Kṛṣṇa must win. No one can defeat Kṛṣṇa. If I had been there, they would have charged that I ordered the shooting and arrested me. Now I am an old man, I cannot take an active stand. So you all must do everything carefully.”

Prabhupāda continued to think and comment on the incident. “The guṇḍā* class doesn’t like Caitanya Mahāprabhu,” he said. “They say Caitanya Mahāprabhu made people emasculated. In Orissa they say that after Mahārāja Prataparudra met Caitanya Mahāprabhu, he lost his kṣatriya strength. He was a very powerful king, but after he met Caitanya Mahāprabhu, he became effeminate.”

* hoodlum

“What is our reply to that?” asked Tamāla Kṛṣṇa.

“What can you reply?” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. “If they conclude something like that, they have no idea of spiritual life. They say this is disruptive, Lord Caitanya’s saying, na dhanaṁ na janaṁ. We don’t want such things, and they want them. So how can you reply to such people? Everyone wants this, and we say that we don’t want it. How can you make a compromise with such people? In your country also they say, ‘What is wrong with illicit sex? What is wrong with intoxication?’ They say we are brainwashing. Is it not? It is very difficult to push on this movement. Still we are doing. That is Kṛṣṇa’s grace.”

Seeing that Śrīla Prabhupāda was disturbed, Tamāla Kṛṣṇa suggested, “Will you try to translate this afternoon, Śrīla Prabhupāda?”

But Prabhupāda continued on the same point. “A young, beautiful woman comes at the dead of night to see Haridāsa Ṭhākura, to offer her body, and he denied. Who will appreciate this?”

“We appreciate,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa.

“You appreciate,” said Prabhupāda, “but in the modern world, who will appreciate?” Prabhupāda continued pointing out the irrevocable split between the devotees and the nondevotees: “Their idea is that a young man cannot live without a young woman, and yet Caitanya Mahāprabhu says, ‘Oh, you are after a young woman? That is more dangerous than drinking poison!’ ”

As Prabhupāda spoke of the Māyāpur devotees who had been willing to sacrifice their lives for Kṛṣṇa, he became choked with emotion and began to cry. “Kṛṣṇa will give them protection,” he said, “our Māyāpur men.” He mentioned how Haridāsa Ṭhākura had also been put into jail and beaten and how Prahlāda Mahārāja had been tortured, until Lord Nṛsiṁha had appeared. “Don’t be worried,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda, crying, and speaking as if all his Māyāpur devotees were directly in front of him. “Kṛṣṇa will protect you. We are doing our best as far as our intelligence goes. Caitanya Mahāprabhu wanted that in every nook and corner of the world this movement should be pushed. We are limited.”

In an attempt to ease Prabhupāda’s sorrow, Tamāla Kṛṣṇa started reading the latest report from Ghanaśyāma, who was distributing books in Eastern Europe. The report of extraordinary success drew Prabhupāda’s attention away from Māyāpur. He smiled and said, “That is dynamic.”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa continued reading the report.

Everywhere we go people either know about you or they are very eager to find out about Krsna and yourself by reading your books. Anyone who has distributed your books in the Communist countries will support my claim that nowhere in the world are people more appreciative of your books.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa looked up from the letter and commented, “He has been everywhere, Prabhupāda, and he says that your books are more appreciated in the Communist countries than anywhere else in the world.”

“Yes,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda, “they are hungry.”

A few days later a full, on-the-scene report came in the mail from Jayapatāka Swami in Māyāpur. The local Hindus of Māyāpur were outraged at what had happened and were mobilizing mass petitions in support of the ISKCON temple. Although the newspaper reports were false, gradually people were learning the facts. Jayapatāka reported vivid details of Bhavānanda and other devotees being marched through Navadvīpa in chains on their way to court and the people of Navadvīpa offering them respects. The devotees were still in jail, he said, constantly chanting Hare Kṛṣṇa.

On the whole, the report was optimistic. Prasādam distribution was continuing in Māyāpur, book distribution in West Bengal was increasing, and the preaching parties were well received wherever they went. Śrīla Prabhupāda’s prediction was coming true: the incident was turning in the devotees’ favor. He commented that the enemies had thought they were digging up a garden snake by attacking Kṛṣṇa’s devotees, but they were finding that they had in fact unearthed a cobra.

July was a good month for Śrīla Prabhupāda’s work on Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam. He continued dictating very early in the morning and in the afternoon, completing chapters Eight and Nine of the Tenth Canto. It was his great pleasure to do so. Working on Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, he was completely transcendental to his physical condition, despite the accompanying heart palpitations and despite his faint voice and general weakness. Even to sit was difficult, and yet once he began working, nothing could stop him.

Speaking into the hand microphone of his dictating machine, oblivious to his bodily condition, Prabhupāda described patiently and methodically how Nanda Mahārāja’s family priest, Gargamuni, performed the name-giving ceremony for baby Kṛṣṇa. In his purports, Śrīla Prabhupāda often spoke from his personal experiences and realizations.

This is the mission of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, and devotees also have the same mission. One who executes this mission of para-upakāra, performing welfare activities for people in general, is recognized by Kṛṣṇa, the Supreme Personality of Godhead, as being very, very dear to Him (na ca tasmān manuṣyeṣu kaścin me priya kṛttamaḥ). Similarly, Caitanya Mahāprabhu has advised this para-upakāra, and He has especially instructed the inhabitants of India. On the whole, the duty of a pure Vaiṣṇava devotee is to act for the welfare of others.

Sometimes sitting in the predawn open air on the second-floor veranda and sometimes in the humid heat of bright afternoon, Śrīla Prabhupāda worked, describing the limitless Vedic knowledge, just as his predecessors, the Gosvāmīs and Kṛṣṇadāsa Kavirāja, had done when worshiping Kṛṣṇa and Lord Caitanya while living in Vṛndāvana. Śrīla Prabhupāda, however, was the first great ācārya to make Kṛṣṇa conscious literature available to persons of all countries throughout the world, regardless of birth status or previous character. Even as he composed the latest chapters of Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, thousands of young men and women were working on his behalf to preach the Vedic message to the world. His disciples were, in fact, keenly aware of how Śrīla Prabhupāda was producing the Tenth Canto purports in Vṛndāvana, and they prayed to Lord Kṛṣṇa that he be allowed to continue for many years, so that he could complete the entire Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam.

In explaining the infant pastimes of Lord Kṛṣṇa, Śrīla Prabhupāda described an entirely transcendental mode of consciousness, beyond material designations of babyhood or old age.

All these pastimes of Kṛṣṇa, and the great enjoyment exhibited by the mothers, are transcendental; nothing about them is material. They are described in Brahma-saṁhitā as ānanda-cinmaya-rasa. In the spiritual world there is anxiety, there is crying, and there are other feelings similar to those of the material world, but because the reality of these feelings is in the transcendental world, of which this world is only an imitation, mother Yaśodā and Rohiṇī enjoyed them transcendentally.

Śrīla Prabhupāda was now rendering a particularly sweet part of Kṛṣṇa’s pastimes, and with relish he described Kṛṣṇa’s stealing butter and feeding it to the monkeys and His showing the universal form to mother Yaśodā. In describing how the vision of Kṛṣṇa’s universal form was beyond mother Yaśodā’s comprehension, Śrīla Prabhupāda shed light on all incomprehensible situations – including his own.

She [mother Yaśodā] could do nothing but offer obeisances to the Lord. One should not try to understand the supreme cause by argument or reasoning. When we are beset by some problem for which we can find no reason, there is no alternative than to surrender to the Supreme Lord and offer Him our respectful obeisances. Then our position will be secure. This was the means adopted in this instance also by mother Yaśodā. Whatever happens, the original cause is the Supreme Personality of Godhead. When the immediate cause cannot be ascertained, let us simply offer our obeisances at the lotus feet of the Lord. Mother Yaśodā concluded that the wonderful things she saw in the mouth of her child were due to Him, although she could not clearly ascertain the cause.

Śrīla Prabhupāda made deep and joyful appreciations of the pure devotion of mother Yaśodā for baby Kṛṣṇa, and he described her as the emblem of all pure devotees of the Lord, especially the residents of Vṛndāvana, who love the Lord in spontaneous affection. “The pure devotees who inhabit Vṛndāvana,” he wrote, “do not possess any bodily conception.” Such pure devotees were fully dedicated to the service of the Lord in sublime affection, prema. This had been described by Lord Caitanya, he said, as the highest perfection of life, pure love in relationship with Kṛṣṇa. “And mother Yaśodā,” Śrīla Prabhupāda wrote, “appears to be the topmost of all the devotees to have attained this perfection.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda was concerned that what he wrote be published and distributed; it was his service to his Guru Mahārāja. And he received great satisfaction in hearing that book distribution was still expanding all over the world. Harikeśa Swami, the G.B.C. of Northern and Eastern Europe, reported that he was printing a very large quantity of books in thirteen languages. After hearing only the beginning of this report, Śrīla Prabhupāda exclaimed, “All the blessings of Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī Mahārāja on you! You are the most important grandson of Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī. Go on doing like this.”

In a similar mood, Śrīla Prabhupāda pushed his G.B.C. secretary for India, Gopāla Kṛṣṇa, to produce Hindi books faster and in greater quantities. Whenever Gopāla Kṛṣṇa came to visit Śrīla Prabhupāda without a new publication, Prabhupāda would reprimand him for his slowness. Gopāla Kṛṣṇa therefore began a policy of visiting Prabhupāda only when he had a new book to present. In mid-July, when Gopāla Kṛṣṇa brought a copy of Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, First Canto, Part Two, in Hindi, Śrīla Prabhupāda accepted it happily and said, “Twice now unless he brings some book he won’t come, because every time I criticize him: ‘Where is the book? Where is the book?’ ”

July 20
Abhirāma arrived and reported to Śrīla Prabhupāda about Māyāpur. There was nothing new in his report. Later, Śrīla Prabhupāda inquired from Tamāla Kṛṣṇa why Abhirāma had come. Tamāla Kṛṣṇa explained that Abhirāma had decided to take up business but was undecided which city to work in – perhaps Bangalore or Bombay.

Later, after Śrīla Prabhupāda had retired for the night and was laying in bed under his mosquito net, he again called for Tamāla Kṛṣṇa. Prabhupāda was concerned that Abhirāma not drift away from the Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement on the plea of looking for business. Śrīla Prabhupāda said that he himself had lived independently in gṛhastha life and so had Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura. “But our aim was different,” he said. “When these neophytes remain aloof from the temple connection, without attending the functions, gradually they will be lost.”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa replied that for that very reason he had suggested to Abhirāma that he make his business in Bombay. “Actually,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “I find the gṛhasthas have no desire to live independent of the temples.” He explained that in the Bombay temple the gṛhasthas could get apartments near enough to the temple so that they could attend the maṅgala-ārati and other functions.

“Yes,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. “Unless these things are continued, the karmīs’ poison will spoil them. He can do independent business. There is no harm. But he must be connected with devotional service.” Śrīla Prabhupāda had not moved his body while talking, but he had turned his head slightly. Now he laid his head on the pillow.

“Just like Abhirāma constructed that house,” Prabhupāda continued. “That’s all right. It is within the campus. There is no harm. But if now he goes away after so much training and advancement, if they are lost, then that’s a great loss for the society. With great difficulty we make one Vaiṣṇava. And again if he goes, like Śyāmasundara, then it is a great loss. The whole idea is to give up attachment for the material world and increase attachment for Kṛṣṇa. That is perfection. Now according to one’s position, it can be done gradually. But this is the aim.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda told Abhirāma that by doing a business in Bombay, he could benefit by living near the temple. “Gṛhasthas should not be dependent on the society,” he said. “At the same time they should not be independent of the society.” Śrīla Prabhupāda laughed at the apparent contradiction. “This is the position,” he said. “Our society cannot take charge of a family. There will be so many numbers of families. How we will support? At the same time, if they remain independent of the society, without touch, then the karmīs’ poison will infect them.” Śrīla Prabhupāda concluded that the solution for the gṛhastha was either to get an apartment near the temple or to live in the temple, if possible. “They should not live completely independent,” he said. “That will be future danger.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda said he wanted ideal Kṛṣṇa conscious gṛhasthas. “Just like Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura,” he said. “There are many. I was gṛhastha also. There was Deity worship, everything nice. I was publishing Back to Godhead as gṛhastha. So the aim of Kṛṣṇa consciousness was there. I could not leave family life because of certain circumstances. That is a different thing. But I must be in touch with devotional service as in the temple. If you live nearby the temple, it is easier. Or in the temple. But if he remains aloof, that is dangerous.”

When Tamāla Kṛṣṇa brought up some problematic details of gṛhasthas living in the temple buildings, Śrīla Prabhupāda stayed to his main point and said, “Anyway, these things have to be adjusted. You cannot follow very rigidly in the case of gṛhasthas. Somehow you have to adjust. We cannot allow them to be lost.” Prabhupāda saw with alarm that after much training, a gṛhastha couple could be lost simply because they disassociated themselves from the temple. It would be a great loss, and in an attempt to avoid it, he was instructing one of his G.B.C. representatives. Prabhupāda said unless this danger was curbed, “then the future of our society becomes hopeless.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda’s servant Upendra was also present, and he asked Prabhupāda about a man’s responsibility to maintain his wife and family. A man should not marry, said Prabhupāda, unless he had the power of maintaining his family. He should not expect the temple to. “Why should we maintain a gṛhastha?” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. “And where is the means? But these things are all to be adjusted. I can give you the idea.” Then Prabhupāda gave the example that if a gṛhastha was maintaining the Deity worship gorgeously in the temple, that was also preaching, and the temple could consider maintaining such a man’s family.

“So the guiding principle,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “should be that under no circumstances should anyone become lost.”

“Yes,” said Prabhupāda. “Or else, where is the preaching? It will be like Alexander the Great. He was conquering, but as soon as he went to conquer a new place, the last place was lost. Suppose I have conquered Bombay. Then I go to Karachi, but in the meantime Bombay is lost. That was being done by Alexander the Great. When there is no proper management … . Just like the British Empire was lost in that way. They could not manage.”

“So similarly we should not expand too quickly,” suggested Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “unless we have the proper management.”

“I am therefore stressing book selling,” said Prabhupāda. He wanted to impress upon his leaders the main outlines of his program, and it should be their duty to carry these programs out. “At least don’t make me Alexander the Great in my lifetime,” he laughed. “They say to me, ‘You are great, great, great.’ But don’t make it small while I am living.”

“Or after,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa. “We’ll never make you that way. We should never do that.”

“Then,” said Prabhupāda, “that’s my request. People recognize I am great. Don’t make me small. I’ll not give you much trouble, but I am now invalid. What can I do?”

“It seems like even if you are invalid,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “it gives us more opportunity to serve you.”

“Thank you,” said Prabhupāda. “What can I do?” He laughed softly and said, “I have to give you that opportunity.”

“It seems that it is your mercy to us,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa.

“All right. Go on,” said Prabhupāda, dismissing them.

“Jaya, Prabhupāda. Thank you for all your merciful instructions.”

July 22
In the morning, Tamāla Kṛṣṇa told Prabhupāda that on the following day Lord Jagannātha would travel down Fifth Avenue in New York City. “Lord Jagannātha is very kind to the mlecchas,” Prabhupāda said. “Oriyans are mostly mlecchas, but still they are made pūjārīs. One devotee criticized an Oriyan, and Lord Caitanya slapped him: ‘Why do you criticize My servants?’ Just see His kindness! I prayed to Kṛṣṇa, ‘Anyone who has given a little service, please bless him.’ And Kṛṣṇa actually does. He doesn’t forget any service done.”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa inquired, “Doesn’t Rādhārāṇī also pray like that to Kṛṣṇa?”

“Yes,” said Prabhupāda. “Rādhārāṇī says, ‘I am not sincere. Here is Your real servant.’ That is mahā-bhāva. Kṛṣṇa becomes a servant to His servant. Therefore a disciple’s first duty is to be submissive to his guru.”

“Śrīla Prabhupāda,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “all your devotees are very much grateful to you.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda suddenly became immersed in thoughts of his devotees, and he became very ecstatic. Closing his eyes and rocking his head, he spoke with a choked voice and tears. “Oh, your intense love for me. I am living for you. All over the world everything is going on – money is coming and being spent – and I don’t have to worry. I am so much indebted. And I am taking so much service from you all.”

“It is we who are indebted,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa. “There is no way we can ever pay this debt to you, Śrīla Prabhupāda.”

“That is a bṛhad-mṛdaṅga,” said Prabhupāda. “I am beating from this room, and the sound goes ten thousand miles away. Our enemies are surprised: ‘How this man is still going on?’ ”

Śrīla Prabhupāda went on appreciating how people in so many cities were enjoying the Ratha-yātrā festivals, seeing Lord Jagannātha, and dancing and chanting. He remembered past Ratha-yātrās, such as in 1969 in San Francisco, when some of the devotees were dancing joyously around a tree. He began recalling many other past wonderful experiences in ISKCON.

Toward the end of July, Prabhupāda’s health seemed to be worsening again. And again he mentioned that the end might come at any moment.

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa had been acting as Śrīla Prabhupāda’s personal secretary for six continuous months, and he had become Prabhupāda’s eyes and ears and his spokesman, especially in dealing with ISKCON management. And he had also become a personal confidant, assisting Śrīla Prabhupāda in his transcendental moods. As a sincere servant, he now began suggesting a different remedy. Śrīla Prabhupāda had recently been feeling and expressing intense devotion toward his disciples in their preaching. Taking this as a cue, Tamāla Kṛṣṇa suggested that if Prabhupāda could travel to the West and be with his disciples there, he would find new life.

“But if I die,” said Prabhupāda, “I want to do so in Vṛndāvana.” Tamāla Kṛṣṇa replied that Śrīla Prabhupāda should not think of dying. If he would go on a tour of the West, see the devotees there, take prasādam made from food grown on the ISKCON farms, then certainly he would respond to such devotion and regain his appetite and strength. Tamāla Kṛṣṇa pointed out that when Śrīla Prabhupāda had been feeling like this in May and the G.B.C. had come, he had responded to their reciprocation of love by increasing his own desire to live.

“One thing you can do,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. “In your daily routine, you can pray to Kṛṣṇa, ‘If You want him to stay, please cure him, and if not, please take him away. We are fully surrendered to You. Now it depends on Your desire to keep him alive or let him leave this world.’ ”

Śrīla Prabhupāda was pointing out that he was not a victim of some mundane moroseness robbing him of a will to live. He had already said that he would be with Kṛṣṇa in any case. Staying in this world or leaving it was not up to him, but up to Kṛṣṇa. He recited the prayer of King Kulaśekhara from the Mukunda-mālā-stotra: “My dear Kṛṣṇa, please let me die immediately so that the swan of my mind can be encircled by the stem of Your lotus feet. Now while I am still strong. Otherwise, at the time of my final breath, when my throat is choked up, how will it be possible to think of You?”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa persisted in his affectionate line, however, insisting that Śrīla Prabhupāda could not think of leaving. There was so much unfinished business for Prabhupāda in this world, such as personally seeing to the installation of the Deities of Rādhā-Rāsavihārī in the Bombay temple.

Śrīla Prabhupāda admitted it was so and added, “Another ambition I have is that the populace is suffering from agnosticism. The rascals are suffering, but they do not know why. I want to drive away agnosticism from the world.” Tamāla Kṛṣṇa assured Śrīla Prabhupāda that if he were to go to the West, agnosticism would be driven out. The devotees were already working hard on Śrīla Prabhupāda’s instruction. But if they could have his physical presence, they would increase their preaching unlimitedly. Tamāla Kṛṣṇa no longer kept himself only in a passive role, waiting for the spiritual master to ring the bell and then waiting to hear what he wanted. Now he was trying to persuade Śrīla Prabhupāda to travel, and as Prabhupāda began to consider it, he became enthusiastic.

“When I am in Vṛndāvana,” said Prabhupāda, “it is transcendental. That much mercy Kṛṣṇa has shown me. And wherever there is our center, that is also Vaikuṇṭha – New York, Los Angeles, Paris, or London.”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa offered an itinerary: a visit to London, staying at the Bhaktivedanta Manor, and also seeing Rādhā-London-īśvara; then to New York and seeing the devotees in the ISKCON skyscraper with Rādhā-Govinda; then to the farm in Pennsylvania; and then Los Angeles, where he could see the new dioramas of Kṛṣṇa’s pastimes.

“To remain in Vṛndāvana is a sentiment,” Śrīla Prabhupāda agreed. “In New York if I die you will have to entomb me on the roof,” he joked grimly. “There is no other room. If I die, as long as I die among you, you are all Vaikuṇṭha men. I had a dream that Vaikuṇṭha men came to take me. They were all white men with shaven heads. Your countrymen cannot believe how you have changed.”

Śrīla Prabhupāda said that they should consult an astrologer to see whether it was auspicious for him to travel and whether he would be cured and how long he would live. “I was born in the evening at four P.M.,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. “It was Nandotsava. You can consult an old Pañjikā to see the day. It was a Tuesday. I am prepared to go to the West.”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa then quoted from the Bhagavad-gītā, Chapter Two, verse 37, where Kṛṣṇa tells Arjuna to fight: “Either you will die and achieve the heavenly planets or conquer and enjoy the earthly kingdom.” Śrīla Prabhupāda said the verse was appropriate. Throughout the night and the next day he considered the traveling proposal and mentioned to his other servants, “Tamāla is arranging a big party.”

“I was praying to Kṛṣṇa, ‘What is this slow death?’ ” Prabhupāda told Tamāla Kṛṣṇa. “Then you quoted that verse. At least my disciples will know I came at the risk of my life. They are the future hope. I must enthuse them. Kṛṣṇa ordered Arjuna, and I am Arjuna’s servant. I am not so limited to think that this is my country. Everything is Kṛṣṇa’s. Why should I limit Kṛṣṇa?”

Tamāla Kṛṣṇa gave encouragement: “When you get there, with so many devotees who are giving their lives for spreading Kṛṣṇa consciousness and assisting you, it will really be enthusing. And you won’t have to speak so much. It’s your presence – your seeing the devotees and them seeing you. So in that sense, it won’t be exhausting. It’s a good climate now, too – August – in London. It’s a very good time.”

Prabhupāda turned to Upendra and said, “His words are making me feel different. Just hearing, I become enthusiastic.”

“Śrīla Prabhupāda,” said Tamāla Kṛṣṇa, “by going West I know you will recover.”

“May Kṛṣṇa fulfill your words,” said Śrīla Prabhupāda. He spent the rest of that afternoon hearing Caitanya-caritāmṛta readings from various devotees. At one point he began to express great bliss and said, “Read Caitanya-caritāmṛta always to me! These three books.* There is no comparison in the world. I may boast like this. I am fortunate to be able to present these books throughout the world, and people are accepting them even blindly.”

* Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, and Bhagavad-gītā